Crystal's Notes 2 Aug

Imagine you’re about to give an important presentation. You can run on one of two fuels. The first is fear. On this fuel, you will be afraid of messing up, so you’d want to be even more on the ball. You’d be afraid of people laughing at you, or that your boss will ask you something you don’t know.

That kind of fear can be a powerful motivator, but it’s also exhausting.

Now contrast that with being fuelled by love and curiosity. With this, you’d be excited about the meeting. You’d be curious about the kind of feedback you’d get, and you’d know your message matters more than your ego.

It’s a subtle but powerful shift: you move from contraction to expansion, from clenching to openness, from reactivity to grounded presence.

When your energy is contracted, you have a tight chest, clenched jaw, and shallow breath, you’re not in a good place to make decisions. You’re reacting, not leading. But when your energy is expansive, when your breath is full, when your body is relaxed and your mind is open, you make better decisions. You will feel spacious, aligned and alive. You move with intention, not tension. 

Yes, you can drive results from fear. But at what cost? Fear depletes. Love sustains. The next time you're preparing for something high-stakes, pause and ask yourself: What fuel am I running on? The answer changes everything.

Shifting From Fear To Love

Once you learn to deactivate your ego attachment and shame button, it’s like stumbling across the cheat code to life itself. Because you will realise you’re not defined by anything you do. You’re you, regardless. You don’t need to get defensive when you hear feedback from others, because you are the same person regardless. You can dust off the precious nugget of learning within the mud and store it deep within your chest. You don’t have to fear a business launch flopping. The same you is still going to be eating dinner with the kids and getting hugged by sticky hands.

Disconnecting the shame button means you can try new things and hard things, and this accelerates your learning and makes you super successful. The people who are stuck in their comfort zone of playing safe and keeping small, ironically are the people who have hard lives that are infused with the envy of seeing others go for what could have been theirs too. 

In my workshops I often do a repeated questioning exercise: What would you do if you had no fear? 

Answer this over and over again until you get to the truth. Because everything you want in life is on the other side of fear.

Much love

Crystal