Crystal's Notes 25 July

New dates for deep human masterclasses just out! (Link here)

I am the kind of person who loves a well-planned itinerary full of “best places”.

The best restaurant, the most efficient route, the museum timing that avoids crowds, all make my heart sing!

But I recently had a trip that became much more enjoyable when I stopped trying to optimise the hell out of it. It was a family reunion for my husband’s family, the agenda was already filled with activities that weren’t planned by me. So all I had to do was show up, or opt out of some of the activities. (Yes I’m the type of wife that doesn’t have guilt about opting out of family events when I am feeling overstimulated or need a break!)

One day I decided to wander off by myself back to the hotel since I had a work call to take later on. I didn’t use Google maps to find the fastest route. I looked at beautiful things in the windows without making them into a IG story. I stepped into shops just because. It felt like a return to my university days
Some of husband’s family also requested not to have any photos of them on social media, which also made it easier to put the camera away and not document everything.

I learned that while optimisation is useful (I built a brand on it!) but it also has a shadow.
When it becomes our default setting, we start treating every part of life as something from which maximum value must be extracted.

Rest must improve productivity. Exercise must produce a measurable result. A hobby should become a side hustle.

Even pleasure becomes another performance metric.
Yet there we are not human doings but human beings. There is beauty just in the not knowing and letting things emerge.

So here is this week’s question which I brought home from Venice for you :

What part of your life might become better if you stopped trying to maximise it?

And can you go for a walk this week without your phone and notice what that is like?

Much Love,
Crystal