Crystal's Notes 7 June

If you’ve tried and failed to be “more disciplined”, take yourself seriously and examine if there are bigger factors at play.

Dig deeper and figure out why you are self-sabotaging. Whether that means going for therapy to heal hidden wounds of the past of being unworthy, or getting an assessment to see if you have ADHD, or working on your boundaries so that you learn how to say no to demands made of your time, take time to ask yourself what really is getting in the way.

Because doing the same old things and expecting different results is the definition of insanity.

However, if you are already making progress in your discipline, don’t expect perfection. We all slip up sometimes and it’s about having the awareness to know when we are off course, and to start again, and show ourselves compassion along the way.

Recently, I had some chaotic family drama and major tech glitches just before an important virtual training. What helped wasn’t some magical resilience. It was a mindfulness practice which allows me to stay present and focused on the current moment instead of ruminating on the past or worrying about the future.

The best thing we can do is to focus on what we can control, and not what we can’t.

So I did what I could control. I minimised exposure to chaos, planned a therapy session and an acupuncture session, arranged tech support, ate well, and went to bed as early as I could. All of these sound simple but self-care and self-respect are the foundations of good leadership and success.

You don’t have to wait for life to be calm before you lead it well. The real work of self-leadership is done in the mess, in the moments you quietly choose awareness over autopilot, presence over panic, and self-respect over self-judgment. That’s where real change begins.

Sometimes immersive experiences in the company of a tribe (like Greg’s Men’s Group!) can also make a huge difference. In our final workshop for Deep Human Club Season 2, we talked about David Whyte and his poem Santiago. The poem reflects that in the end, it is about coming home to yourself, and realising that the destination isn’t about golden domes and cheering crowds, but in a simple reflection of your face and an invitation. Our members loved it, and it was a wonderful conclusion to an amazing season of growth and community.

Deep Human Club is a 6-month journey of transformation for our members, where they get access to monthly mentoring, networking events and workshops with me, Greg, and a whole array of experts in personal and professional growth. We have a VIP Club, which is the face-to-face journey, and a virtual version for those who can’t join us in person.

We are already half full from renewing Season 2 members and have about 500 people on the waitlist! We are doing a sneak preview and early access on 8 June, Sunday. Sign up here and you’ll have the information emailed to you!

Much love

Crystal