Crystal's Notes - 10th December 2023

Dear Community

We are starting the 2024 with our most popular signature training programme, Deep Human Leadership!

Happening on 20th and 21st January 2024, you will learn how you can develop emotional intelligence, resilience & mindful leadership. The programme will also set you on the path towards cultivating a growth mindset and overcoming limiting beliefs. You will learn how to enhance stakeholder management, develop and coach others and create a culture of learning. We will also cover how you can navigate difficult conversations, resolve conflicts & create a high-performance culture.

It will be a two-day live training, and we will also be hosting two virtual practice sessions after the live trainings for participants to integrate their skills, share their progress and receive guidance. You can get more details and sign up here.

Speaking of navigating difficult conversations and resolving conflicts, Greg and I had an interesting issue presented to us recently – in the form of a rooster no less!

Our new neighbour came home one day with a rooster, and while I am all for people doing what they love, including keeping the type of pets that they want, this rooster was a workaholic! Unlike usual roosters who would only crow at dawn to herald the start of the day, it would crow loudly and proudly at random timings, like in the middle of the night when I am trying to sleep. I’ve kept cattle and poultry on my farm in Australia before and my roosters definitely did not behave like that. It didn’t help that the acoustics of our place echoed its loud proclamations. After yet another night of enduring its loud crowing, I looked over at my neighbour’s garden and saw that it lived in a small cage. Perhaps that was why it was complaining so much!

Even though I teach conflict resolution, my Singaporean brain kicked in when Greg said we could speak to the neighbour about the rooster situation. I told Greg he was being hopeful; the neighbour would never listen. He would cry fowl (ha) and tell us to mind our own business. Maybe the neighbour wouldn’t even answer the door! Greg was adamant that something could be done. By this time, my IG community was fully invested in the Rooster Situation.

Many had offered suggestions on authorities I could call, but an equal number also sent me recipes of chicken-based dishes! A poll I put up on whether Greg could negotiate for peace showed that a significant number had faith in him, so a lot was on his shoulders. 

Greg came back with a huge smile on his face. He said the neighbour had been amiable and understanding, and that he would relocate the rooster to the back of the house, where its crowing would not disturb us. My brain exploded with questions. How did he do it? What did he say? Unfortunately, my admiration for my conflict-resolving husband came to a screeching halt when he said that he had told the neighbour that the crowing was affecting his ‘neurotic wife’!!

The ‘neurotic wife’ comment aside, this was Greg’s Rooster Playbook:

1. Display empathy:  Greg introduced himself to our neighbour while bearing gifts, signifying that he meant no danger to them. He also kept his love for chicken soup away, and talked about how he loved animals instead. 

2. Use in-grouping: After welcoming the neighbour to the estate, Greg talked about how WE loved living here because WE had a supportive community, and how the COMMUNITY loved the quietness of our estate.

3. Give them the benefit of the doubt: Greg did not want to make the neighbours feel like he was blaming or judging them, so he assumed positive intentions on their side. He told them that perhaps they were not aware, but the rooster was making a lot of noise through the night. 

4. Help them understand impact: During conflict resolution, it is paramount to help the other person understand the impact of their actions. In this case, it was my quality of sleep, and how the crowing was affecting the quiet of the estate, something the community here valued. 

Many times, our assumptions can get the better of us. I had thought there would be no use convincing my neighbour that their pet was annoying, but Greg clearly showed that the situation was not beyond repair. What a great lesson it was for me on making assumptions, all thanks to our new rooster neighbour.

Many said they would use Greg’s Rooster Playbook for some conflicts they are facing. You can most definitely do that, and learn it from the best here!